Saturday, January 29, 2005
trashed
argh~ ganna trashed today in the friendly match against NYGH squash gals... not that i want to win, but at least not TRASHED. -sulk-
... darn. the more i think of it the more i am angry with myself. i totally suck. can't even return the stupid service. and when i finally get to serve, it was out. wat a total idiot.
maybe it's time for me to seriously think about brushing up my skills le. otherwise i'll be malu-ated in every of the friendly matches... I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN!!! I'LL HAF NIGHTMARES!!!
è¯å yawned @ 4:10 PM
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Friday, January 28, 2005
my resolution.
i had the shock of my life when i saw the result on the fat analyser... i gained so much fat when compared to the time i took a measurement in JC2!!! my goodness.
Tt's the last straw. I mean, i must come to terms that i had been deceiving myself that i am still maintaining my health (and figure), and it's time to MOVE ON. i must get back my exercise regiment. i must get back my proper diet.
and hence, no fried food more than once a week. muz finish the water in my water bottle for 2 rounds each day in school. and no more sweetened drinks.
n since i really haf no oppurtunity to go swimming in school le, so morning jog! starting with every wednesday.
dunno if i can indeed stick with my whole plan.... i mean, wat about CNY??? *doubts*
è¯å yawned @ 9:22 PM
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Thursday, January 27, 2005
things that irks me.
10 examples of things tt really gets on my nerves.
- Being so very incompetent
- Knowing i'm such a procrastinator and yet, cannot muster enough motivation to quit procrastinating
- Being told the exact flaw that i know i have, but cannot eliminate becoz i'm a procrastinator
- Being treated like a kid
- Being treated like a know-it-all
- Being treated like a slave
- Hoping for something good when deep down i know it'll all turn out bad
- That my bad premonitions almost always turn true
- Being so very STUPIDLY stubborn at inappropriate times
- Being the very person that i know i'll hate if i see myself on the streets.
Oh my goodness. how i hate myself. And the most condemnable thing is that i can still bring myself to like this person that i hate so much.
Talk about contradicting personality.
è¯å yawned @ 9:43 PM
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Friday, January 21, 2005
wasted trip... =(
ytdy went to SPD, and i thought that since it's only a few MRT stops from the clinic i frequent, i'll drop by for my long overdued appointment with the doctor. n since tt clinic is near the comix shop tt i purchase my comix from, i thought tt i'll pay it a visit after the clinic also.
i also wanted to finish my errands and get home faster to enjoy part of my long weekend.
So i was rushing abit when i reached Kovan MRT. got on the bus, got off the bus, waiting at the traffic light. In my "rush" i hit my little toe against the cement at the bottom of the traffic light... OMG it numbed and the pain soon spread up to my leg~ i was like standing motionless at the traffic light. I thought tt it muz be bleeding, given the excruciating pain, but it wasn't. Luckily the pain subsided abit b4 the pedestrian light turned green, so i was able to maintain an almost normal gait to the opposite side of the road.
And as i walked and hobbled to the clinic, i found, to my horror, ....
THE CLINIC IS CLOSED.
i stared dumbfounded at the metal gate for like 15 sec, checked the opening hours on the wall which says it closes at 4.30 on thursdays, and checked my watch tt says 6.32pm. I also checked my appointment card, to see if the opening hours are indeed so. n yeah, it was.
n so i hobbled back to the MRT station, at the same time cursing some unknown entity tt failed to remind me to check the opening hours on my apptment card. n as i was sitting on the MRT, i suddenly gained a new insight tt the unknown entity won't be happy by juz one trip to get an injured toe, and i begin to suspect tt my next trip to the comix shop will also be a hazardous one.
so i called up the comix shop and enquired abt its opening hours. ah~ it opens til 9pm. sure no problem one! ah ok! my comix is there in the shop... okok. still seems fine til this moment...
er. wait a minute, u say there's another bk coming in tml?
... ok nvm den. maybe not coming down today to pick up the bk. i'll look for another day to collect the 2 bks together. yes yes... thx alot! bye.
n hence, i went straight home. Talk about a wasted trip. oh pardon me! it's not a wasted trip. i had gained a brand new swollen little toe tt is still aching at this moment, thank you very much. i had even suspected tt it's a sprain. hopefully i can still run abit for squash tml.
n oh ya. i'll be making the same trip tml morning. hopefully everything will turn out fine.
è¯å yawned @ 10:14 PM
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Monday, January 17, 2005
sorry
i'm sorry that i lost it and showed u a black face. It's just that i've been sitting infront of the stupid computer for so many hours and i still can't figure out how to connect your phone to the pc. I am juz feeling irritataed becoz i'm also getting sticky. I simply wanna go n bathe.
It also doesn't help when i know i've tons of things i haven't do yet, and i'm stuck in front of the computer doing repetitive, stupid things.
anyway, itz really getting late, and i think i haf the right to get angry over the fact tt u dun seem to be in a hurry to let me go n sleep, so tt i can get up early to finish up my work.
anyway, ur phone sux. i hate nokia phones, esp your N6260. it is so not user friendly. i got lost in its so many folders so many times tt u shd feel happy tt i didn't smash ur phone into pieces. the user guide helped a great deal. try doing it urself next time.
still protective over ur stupid phone? c'mon, den tell me why mine works fine with the bluetooth adapter n urs cause so much trouble?
sorry i raised my voice again, but it also fueled me somemore when a not-automatic senior tt keep bugging me so many times a day for my grandma. she doesn't understand my msg issit? i'll contact her on wed! STOP BUGGING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
basically, i'm sorry ok? i juz need some time to cool off.
n some time to sleep.
è¯å yawned @ 1:04 AM
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Sunday, January 16, 2005
Health Psych... BEWARE!!!
The health psych teacher is a young man with seemingly boyish charm, which is reflected in the way he cackles and speak. He also claps his hand with his fingers apart, placed straight right under his chin.
In short, like a "boy boy".
However, i was deceived by his appearance. In the lecture session, where we were split into grps to discuss abt a topic (which i currently forgot what it was), i had some controversial ideas. Being the way i am, i presented my ideas, making sure that they are my personal opinion, not that of the grp.
However, he turned the tables ard, by "attacking" the comments with a verocious attitude. I was left scarred by the attack.
But again, being the way i am, i was reluctant to let it end like that. So i counter-attacked.
The decision proved to be fatal. I was left in a pool of tears from the verbal battle. I also became the laughing stock of my class.
I was thoroughly, eternally, emotionally scarred.
I will never, ever, have the courage to speak up in class again.
This is what the god of dreams, or perhaps 周公, showed me last night.
So tell me, isn't he a figure that i shd be aware of???
Better not sleep during his class anymore.
è¯å yawned @ 11:04 AM
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Saturday, January 15, 2005
guys and gals~
FROM A FORWARDED EMAIL. DO U AGREE?
Guys drink to forget about the girl...
Girls drink to think back about the guy...
When guys are in love, they become poor.
When girls are in love, they become pretty...
Guys can forget, but cannot forgive...
Girls can forgive, but cannot forget..
Guys care the most about the quantity of love...
Girls care the most about the quality of love..
Guys break-up when they feel love from another girl...
Girls break-up when they feel the feeling of separation from her man...
Guys feel curiosity towards all girls...
Girls feel curiosity towards guys who are interested in her..
When guys are heartbroken, they try to forget about the girl by going out with another girl...
When girls are heartbroken, they try to find his characteristics from another guy...
Guys wish to be her first love....
Girls wish to be his last love...
Women are nothing but trouble,
And Men are nothing but trouble seekers!
VERY GENERIC, BUT IT TRULY REFLECTS WHAT U SEE ON TELEVISION! haha.
è¯å yawned @ 8:32 PM
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Friday, January 14, 2005
reflecting on the field trip to MINDS today...
Perhaps it's becoz i have a pre-perception of the organisation and its programs, but after looking around and listening to the talk, i still feel quite unsatisfied with the organisation.
In case some are unsure wat i'm talking about, MINDS is an organisation that offers a variety of programs for the intellectually disabled, usually those with IQ below 50.
Well. I'm juz having a general feeling of dissatisfaction. If u want me to pinpoint one aspect, i can only name one --> the "jobs" they create for the clients.
You see, the way it is structured, it seems that other than working in MINDS, there's no way u can achieve social integration and work in the community. The client-therapist ratio is so high that i do not think that therapist can actively sought out vocations that each individual clients are suitable for, nor can they help develop specific skills that allows the client to work outside.
Note also that during the talk, the number of clients that successfully gotten a job outside is below 10, when there are 50+ "training" in the program. We did not hear anything about how many of them retained their jobs, and for how long.
And if the clients do indeed work in MINDS, how long will they be able to do so? until wat age? there are always new cases being introduced into MINDS, and the older ones can't always stick around... wat will happen to them if they're unable to maintain any job outside of MINDS?
Working inside the organisiation and outside of it are totally different experience. I've seen how the public can refuse to show understanding to the slower pace of work of some challenged individuals. The stress of working outside... can it be learned in the organisation?
Learning to generalise skills is not as easy as it seems. These challenged individuals cannot generalise well. They think in a linear pattern. For example, if u show them one way of solving a problem, when shown a similar one, they'll repeat the same solution, even though a more appropriate solution is obvious to us the supposedly normal ones. Can individuals really bring their skills to the outside?
there's also the bit about the environment. i don't like it. it feels.... institutionalised, enclosed, trapped. i really don't see how OTs are supposed to function, when the whole center is measuring therapeutic outcomes by profit, and not the whole functional outcomes, which includes leisure pursuits, ADL function at home, and perhaps community mobility, which includes purchasing things in the community.
but again, these are just my initial impressions. maybe if i ever get attached to MINDS in the future clinical placements, the experience may change my mind.
It might not, too.
è¯å yawned @ 10:34 PM
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Thursday, January 13, 2005
Maple: I killed the blue mushrooms!!!
Yay!!! i finally plucked up the courage to jump into the "blue fire" and managed to kill the blue mushrooms!!!
ALTHOUGH IT COST ME QUITE ALOT OF POTIONS AND EVENTUALLY ALSO 2 LIFES...
I am so proud of myself.
è¯å yawned @ 10:18 PM
a timetable IS a timetable
i truly believe that the purpose of a timetable is to keep the sch admin, teachers and students informed of their schedules, and hence to be able to better manage their time, so that they can juggle their school and personal life with better ease. It also ensures tt the teachers can find a reason to blame students if the students happen to be late, and vice versa.
A timetable is NEVER meant to inconvenience us.
So i really REALLY will appreciate it if the teachers would also honour their part of the deal, and REFRAIN FROM LAST MINUTE CHANGES IN OUR TIMETABLE. They shd understand that we have something called a social life, and we might already have planned something.
I'm so darned mad. How am i gonna answer to my date?
è¯å yawned @ 1:10 PM
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Wednesday, January 12, 2005
presentation....
today's the day for my clinical presentation! hear me speak!!!
*CLAP CLAP CLAP*
all was fine and well, with my usual fast paced rendition of the mental rehearsed information. Juz that i still stumble over my words and gropping for vocabulary.. but tt's ok, coz i've knda anticipated tt actually haha.
Unfortunately, towards the end of the presentation, when time is already not enuff, i managed to malu myself even more by whispering *loudly* "where is my last peice of transparency har?", hence managing to put not only myself, but my fellow classmates sitting right infront of me in a fluster.
*CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*
I DON'T GET IT!?!?!?! Where could tt idiot transparency disappear to??? fly away???
Anyway, it's still lost in action til this very second, thank you very much.
è¯å yawned @ 1:00 PM
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Tuesday, January 11, 2005
THE premier...
Now. why am i creating a blog becoz of the premier of [My Brothers] when i'm not even a fan of the korean heart throb Won Bin? Why didn't i create a blog when i went for JAY CHOU's concert instead?
BECAUSE I HAVE THE TIME NOW.
Anyway i'm creating a blog now to commemerate the day where i'll be attending the FIRST premier of my life, with the FIRST tickets from the FIRST lucky draw that i've actually won something from.
This will also be the FIRST movie that i'll definitely have to go even with a suffocating migraine.
NOW THAT IS WORTH COMMEMERATING.
è¯å yawned @ 5:01 PM
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